Hey buddy. How you doin? Oh, you're here cause you had a split from your girl and you think your tactics are gonna work with the next one? Oh, okay. Rookie move yo. Let me let you in on a little secret...you suck. Your dream is that there's a girl out there that is gonna be as low maintenance as your Xbox? You can turn it on and off as you please. You can leave for awhile, come right back and pick up where you left off. It doesn't shout when you neglect it. It doesn't ask you for anything, but gives you exactly what you want when you want it. I'm a girl, not an Xbox, just like your a guy and not a pocketbook....right? Wrong!
Just like you want that low maintenance girl...I want that provider guy. Don't ask if I need help...shell it over! Obvs I'm in need of new clothes, like all of the time! See the lack of tea cup chihuahua's I have? Pay for my meals, all of them. I don't mean just pay for every meal, I mean take me out for. every. meal. What is so hard to understand about my expectation that you are going to pay my bills: My car. My phone. My house. Don't you know if you did that I'd give you the world?
You want that low maintenance girl...she doesn't exist.
I want that provider guy...neither does he.
So what you say we just both pretend this personal ad never happened and we both keep walking.